We’ve been watching a lot of The Little Einsteins lately, and I mean a lot. Maria loves them and to my surprise, so does the little guy. I’ve never, and I mean never, ever seen P sit and watch a whole episode of anything, even kid-friendly and age-appropriate shows. So this is a welcome surprise because he gets to unwind on the couch with his little sis and nodding off is much much easier,as well. So here we are watching a segment that’s titled “He Speaks Music” and without wanting to I look over to my little guy. What does he speak?
Tonight as I was getting him ready in his pjs I said: “Panayioti I love you this, this much” and I extened my arms as wide as I could. “How much do you love me?” I asked him. He raised his arms, with his index finger extended and said “dee dee”. With a smile. I guess P doesn’t speak music, but something else. I once read about a mom who very cleverly stated that her son speaks Alienese. That made me smile. It still does. There are days when all we hear all day long is “dee dee” or “dan dan”. If that’s not alienese I don’t know what is.
P will turn 6 in just five months and has yet to speak audible, whole words. Real words. Sometimes when I let this thought, this fact, sink deep inside me, I start to feel fear. True fear. The type of fear that makes your knees tremble and want to vomit at the same time. I know, it’s not a great feeling and not something I want to dwell too too much on because I’m his mom and am supposed to think only positive thoughts, but sometimes, and I don’t know why, I want to feel this fear too. I don’t want to shut my eyes to reality. I want to accept everything, even the negative, scary as hell parts of life. My son is going to turn 6 soon and does not speak . . . still.